Tremendously flawed
is how you feel essentially
Unworthiness
faces you in the mirror
Beauty belongs to the other
Fortune belongs to the other
Joy belongs to the other
You are separated from it all
Exclusion makes you want to spoil it
Excluded, not exclusive
are you
Not for you
Not you
Not enough
Deserve it
It echoes from the chambers of the past
Painfully you notice
All you crave, all you desire
It’s with the other
It’s on the other side
Unreachable
A place you have no access to
where you are not wanted
Something in you wants to invade it
and annihilate it
invisibly
Like cancer
The pain
When you look into the mirror
The image reminds you
of your worthlessness
Ugliness
Alienation
Separateness
Desire to ruin what you see in front of your eyes
This face
And the other face
That seems to look down on you
In its beauty
In its exclusiveness
In its perfection
Being gifted with whatever you desire
While you are gifted
with scarcity
and poverty
and insignificance
And beneath your fake, pleasing smile
Dwells a pain
deeply buried
hidden
You will never share
While you look up in false admiration
To what seems to be the epitome of your unfulfilled desires
Which deep down inside
Eat you alive
drown you
And poison you
slowly
