Here you are now, naked in front of me – or do I face my naked self?
Before, you were not aware where it’s heading and what it’s about. And now, it is still far less clear. With cold eyes, I’m looking at you, but you can’t read a Mu in them, they don’t give you the slightest insight. You seem to be defenseless with nothing left on the body that could warm and protect you from my piercing gaze. With your back to the wall, a bead of sweat appears on your forehead. Is it fear, or is it lust?
You’re waiting for something to occur, and yet you do not know what is happening to you. It seems to pass no seconds, no more breath of air moving in the room which touches your bare skin. Does something incise your throat so that you barely can breathe? Is it hot or cold running down your back?
The loops around your joints tighten, increasing your immobility immeasurably. You try to resist your fixation, but the moment you move you notice it, the noose around your neck. Now panic arises in you. “How did it get around my neck? How did she do it?” It’s notching your windpipe, and between choking and gasping, you try to calm yourself, to find a position that will at least allow you to breathe shallowly in this state of constriction.
Your chest is moving up and down hastily, so trapped are you in this physicality that you have not noticed that she has long since left the room. Left you behind, to yourself. Powerless, with no control over what happens next to you here. If you were able to move, you would tremble, and this loss of control captures you more and more. An unimaginable intensity rises in you, a memory of a long forgotten taste, irritating, like a sweet, devastating poison.
And then the lights go out. And soon there will be light.